​Shame, Guilt, and Low Self-Worth Counselling in Cambridge

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Feelings of shame, guilt, and low self-worth can affect the way we see ourselves, our relationships, and the way we move through life. They can leave you feeling not good enough, overly self-critical, disconnected from yourself, or as though you constantly fall short no matter how hard you try.

These feelings are often deeply painful and can quietly shape many areas of life without always being fully recognised.

I offer counselling in Cambridge for shame, low self-worth, self-esteem difficulties, trauma, anxiety, and emotional overwhelm in a warm, supportive, and non-judgemental space.

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Understanding Shame and Guilt

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Shame can feel like there is something fundamentally wrong with you as a person, whilst guilt is more often connected to feeling you have done something wrong.

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For some people, these feelings may show up as:

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People pleasing

Constant self-blame

Perfectionism and self-pressure

Difficulty setting boundaries

Fear of rejection or abandonment

Comparing yourself to others

Struggling to accept kindness, rest, or support

Emotional withdrawal or avoidance

Overachieving or becoming highly independent

Feeling intense pressure to meet the expectations of others​

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Low self-worth can also affect confidence, relationships, parenting, work life, and the ability to trust yourself or your decisions.

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Where Low Self-Worth Can Develop

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These feelings often have roots in earlier life experiences and relationships. Growing up around criticism, emotional neglect, bullying, unrealistic expectations, abuse, trauma, addiction, conflict, or feeling unseen or unsupported can all shape the way we come to view ourselves.

Sometimes shame develops through repeated experiences of feeling rejected, unsafe, different, or as though love and acceptance were conditional.

Cultural messages, family dynamics, social pressures, and difficult life experiences can also contribute to feelings of inadequacy, self-judgement, and chronic self-criticism.

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Trauma, Abuse, and Internalised Shame

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For survivors of abuse or trauma, shame can become especially deep and painful. Many people carry a belief that what happened to them was somehow their fault, or that there must be something wrong with them for those experiences to have happened.

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Some people may grow up believing:

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“I must be unlovable”

“I am not worthy”

“I am too much”

“If I had been different, this would not have happened”

 

In reality, the shame belongs with the person who caused harm, not the person who survived it. Yet these painful beliefs can become deeply internalised and continue to affect relationships, trust, emotional wellbeing, and self-worth long after the experiences themselves.

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The Impact of Harsh Inner Criticism

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Over time, shame and low self-worth can become so familiar that they begin to feel like facts rather than learned emotional responses. Many people carry harsh inner criticism that was never truly theirs to begin with. Therapy can help you begin recognising these patterns with greater awareness, compassion, and understanding.

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Counselling for Shame and Low Self-Esteem in Cambridge

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Therapy offers a warm, supportive, and non-judgemental space to explore these feelings with compassion and curiosity.

As a pluralistic and trauma-informed therapist, I tailor therapy to the individual. Together, we can begin to understand:

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Where these beliefs about yourself may have come from

How past experiences continue to affect you

Emotional triggers and relationship patterns

Perfectionism and self-pressure

Boundaries and people pleasing

Anxiety, overwhelm, and self-criticism

Your emotional needs and sense of self

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Therapy can help you develop greater self-awareness, self-compassion, healthier boundaries, and a more balanced and accepting relationship with yourself.